...Because We Have Daughters

I started to write this article several times, and each time I had to stop. I finally concluded I was having trouble expressing myself for two reasons. The first problem is that it's a far ranging topic, making it hard to find proper boundaries. The second reason is that I take it kind of personally- because we have daughters! This is about women's rights, women's status, and women's health.  I take it personally because my kids are women. That is not to say that I have been oblivious to women's issues up until now- I haven't. My wife and I have always shared social and political thoughts (and actions) supporting the advancement of women's rights. But for many men (me included) I believe it is critically important to think about the advancement of women's issues on a visceral level- on a feeling level- in order to be better fathers, or just better men.

As fathers, we would do anything to protect our children from harm and help them succeed. As men we would do anything in our power to protect or help our spouses or partners. We want all of our family members to prosper and to have good health. We want them to reach their absolute best, and use all their potential. We want them to be respected as people, live in safety, and be treated with dignity. I have to think even the most chauvinistic men wouldn't want what they say or think about women said about their own daughters. I believed that we had achieved some measure of those ideals. I knew that we were along way from full equality for women, but I thought some significant progress had been made. That's why I have been so disheartened by the tenor of our politics and our culture over the last year or two.

In my earlier attempts to capture that feeling of disappointment I considered revisiting the old business of Roe v. Wade as a way to illustrate how this neo-conservative movement had gone completely wrong in it's treatment of women. No matter where you stand on the issue of abortion, The Roe v. Wade decision was not decided on the basis that seven of the nine Justices (all male) just liked abortion. Far from it-they did not!  Roe v. Wade was a 4th and 14th Amendment case. It was about the Constitutionally protected (and sacred) right of privacy (4th Amendment) and the Constitutionally protected (and sacred) right of due process under law (14th Amendment). In essence it said women control their own bodies (at least in early pregnancy) and governments cannot interfere without due process. Many people disagree with the effect of the ruling- but it has never been overturned for one simple reason: rights granted and reaffirmed under this decision are fundamental Constitutional Rights, for all citizens including women.

In the last year or two there have literally been hundreds of bills introduced in state legislatures, and some in Congress signifying that my kids shouldn't have certain rights as citizens or women. I take offense to those efforts- because we have daughters. This effort has been dubbed the "War on Women" and it has been laid squarely at the feet of the Republican party. The Republicans, of course,  have claimed there is no "war on women"- and it's a "manufactured issue" made up by the Democrats to distract us. So, is there a "war on women"? A war on my children? I don't know how we can look at the efforts of Republicans since the 2010 election and conclude there is not a "war on women". That means our daughters are under attack.

Lets look at the record. In just the last year nine more states have attempted to pass, or passed legislation forcing women into medically unnecessary ultra-sound or other medically intrusive procedures specifically aimed at shaming or discouraging women from obtaining legal abortions. Again, no matter where you stand on abortion- this is a statement about the ability of women to think for themselves or make decisions for themselves. These laws say to women- "you must submit to our practices and biases before you exercise your judgement about your own bodies guaranteed by the Constitution. These laws say, "we know best-and you no longer have the privacy and personal security the Constitution guarantees". These laws say women are inferior citizens by virtue of their womanhood.

In Congress there was an attempt to limit access to birth control provided by employers' insurance  if the employer had any "moral" objection to the use of birth control (Blunt-Rubio). Our U.S. Senate stopped this affront to women because a Democratic majority would not allow it- though it passed easily in the Republican controlled House. To have this kind of law passed would have been the slippery slope of all time. Do we really want to allow Joe the tire store guy making health care decisions for his female employees? What does say about the status of women? It says women now must get permission from any employer just to get basic health care. Ask any woman (particularly your adult daughters) and you will learn that contraception is BASIC HEALTH CARE. What if Joe is a Christian Science believer or a Jehovah's Witness? He would not have to offer much coverage to anyone-based on his own morals. But Republicans  in Congress were willing to take that road on women's health care. The Tennessee Legislature was debating a bill that would require a physician to lie to women considering an abortion. I cannot think of anything more intrusive or improper that requiring a doctor to lie to a patient (with criminal consequences) to achieve a political end. But that's how far this has gone.

In Wisconsin, last week the Republican Governor vetoed a state bill that would have required equal pay for women. When asked about the Federal law requiring equal pay for women the Romney campaign needed several hours to think about it before answering they favored equal pay under the Lilly Ledbetter Law. They even had a couple of Republican women in the House of Representatives come out to support Romney on this- but both of those Republican Congresswomen voted against the bill themselves. And, there is still a difference in wage levels between men and women in this country. When Limbaugh went on his rampage against Ms. Fluke, calling her a "slut", not one prominent Republican stood up to denounce this misogynistic characterization of women.  All Mr. Romney had to say was that he would have used "different words". Sadly, no one ever asked which words he would have used instead of "slut".

Of the 119 bills introduced in various states last year and the bills introduced in Congress there are two common threads. They were all an attempt to limit, reduce or eliminate rights or services already granted to women, and they were all (100%) introduced and supported by the Republican party. So to answer the question: yes there is a "war on women" and yes it is be waged by the Republican party. The puzzling part is, why? Perhaps a small group of very conservative elected folks somehow believe these attempts will bring us back to the "good old days". If you were a woman in those days- it wasn't so good, because women were stuck in prescribed roles. I don't want those "old" days back- because we have daughters. Perhaps this is a shallow attempt to appeal to that illusive super-conservative "base" everyone talks about.  The supreme irony of these efforts is that are being supported by the same people who argue against "Obama Care" because "its an unprecedented intrusion of the government into your private health care, and puts the government between you and your doctor". (Not true) but apparently it's OK if you're a woman. These laws and proposed laws are more intrusive than anything in the Affordable Health Care Act. This conservative movement wants to  make every health care and reproductive decision for women-seemingly out of some sense of moral superiority. These are the same people who say they revere the Constitution so much- but don't really want it to fully apply to women. I'm reminded of the House hearings on contraception with Chairman Issa- he didn't invite or allow any women to testify. The Republicans can claim there's no war on women. They can even say the Democrats are actually doing it- but, as always, actions speak louder than words. If you examine the Ryan (Romney) budget proposal you will see just how punishing their proposed actions will be on women. Put the rhetoric aside and look at the policies to see who is at war with women.

I can understand why women favor Democrats over Republicans by a wide margin in the polls right now. Women get it. It's very personal to them. But I'm making a plea for men to get in the fight too. These are women's issues for sure- but they are men's issues too. How can we hold our young daughters and tell them they can be anything they want to be, or that they are entitled to be respected as full citizens when we know it isn't entirely true? All of us have to be aware of what's happening. All of us should  be in the fight  for full equality for women, if for no other reason- because we have daughters!

Thanks for looking in.
P.S. Normally I would not use the word "war" to describe a political debate or movement because real war is such a horrible and damaging behavior. The word "war" itself should only be used in its true context so we don't diminish its horror. But I felt compelled to use it in this article because it has become a common term in this debate.